'Scuse Me While I Kill This Guy by Leslie Langtry

YOU CAN'T PICK YOUR FAMILY... 
Death by Chocolate is her favorite dessert. And those knitting needles aren't just for craft projects. To most people, Gin Bombay is an ordinary single mom. Then again, they don't know she's from a family of top secret assassins. Somewhere between leading a Girl Scout troop for her kindergartner--would nooses count for a knot badge?--and keeping their puppy from destroying the furniture, Gin now has to take out a new target. 

BUT YOU CAN PICK THEM OFF
Except this target has an incredibly hot Australian bodyguard who knows just how to make her weak in the knees. But with a mole threatening to expose everything, Gin doesn't have much time to let her hormones do the happy dance. She's got to find the leak and clear her assignment...or she'll end up next on the Bombay family hit list.

There isn't too much to say about a book that is less than 200 pages long (in ebook).

This was a cute, fun and fast read.

It's not an exceptional book. The writing wasn't great, the plot was ridiculous and it was incredibly predictable yet I still enjoyed reading it. I laughed out loud on several occasions and I liked the characters, Ginny especially. It was a great light read to get me out of a funk.

I will probably read the rest in the series.

3 out of 5 stars GET IT HERE:'Scuse Me While I Kill This Guy (Greatest Hits Mysteries)

We Have Always Lived in the Castle by Shirley Jackson

Merricat Blackwood lives on the family estate with her sister Constance and her uncle Julian. Not long ago there were seven Blackwoods—until a fatal dose of arsenic found its way into the sugar bowl one terrible night. Acquitted of the murders, Constance has returned home, where Merricat protects her from the curiousity and hostility of the villagers. Their days pass in happy isolation until cousin Charles appears. Only Merricat can see the danger, and she must act swiftly to keep Constance from his grasp.

It has been over 24 hours since I finished it and I still can't figure this book, or all it's high ratings, out.

My first reaction after finishing the book was, "What the hell?!" I have no idea what I was expecting from this book but I can tell you, I didn't get it.

First off, the book is filed under, horror, suspense and mystery on Goodreads. I don't understand how it could ever fall into those categories. There was absolutely no horror or suspense or mystery. I guess it is supposed to be a psychological thriller? I didn't see that either. Yes, there is a plethora of psychological disorders in it, ranging from agoraphobia to OCD but a thriller? No.

Secondly, there were so many threads left dangling and questions unanswered. A lot of books do this but nothing was really explained in this one. Nothing. Also, the one part that was supposed to be the shocking twist was seen from a mile away and the drama was lackluster.

We Have Always Lived let me down. I still can't say I hated it though, which is the confusing part. The one saving grace of the story was that there were a few fantastic prose throughout. They would come out of nowhere and take me by surprise.


2 out of 5 stars

A Woman in Berlin: Eight Weeks in the Conquered City: A Diary by Anonymous

For eight weeks in 1945, as Berlin fell to the Russian army, a young woman kept a daily record of life in her apartment building and among its residents. "With bald honesty and brutal lyricism" (Elle), the anonymous author depicts her fellow Berliners in all their humanity, as well as their cravenness, corrupted first by hunger and then by the Russians. "Spare and unpredictable, minutely observed and utterly free of self-pity" (The Plain Dealer, Cleveland), A Woman in Berlin tells of the complex relationship between civilians and an occupying army and the shameful indignities to which women in a conquered city are always subject--the mass rape suffered by all, regardless of age or infirmity.

This is a review I don't want to write. I don't think I could ever truly describe the haunting beauty of this book.

This is a heart-breakingly uninhibited account of Russian occupied Berlin by a German woman. She writes of day to day life which happens to be filled with bomb raids, pillaging for food and, once the Ivans invade, rape and murder.

The author, who was later revealed to be Marta Hillers, was once a journalist and you can see it in her writing. As I said before, I don't think I can give it any justice so I will just say her writing is beautiful and intelligent and so straight forward. It's actually because of the straight forwardness that it took me so long to read it. To read her writing about so many terrible incidents without malice really hurts your heart.

This is not a fun book to read. It is very difficult in most parts but it speaks frankly of how society adapts in extreme danger, how it all becomes about survival of the individual and then how it struggles to build itself back up in the end.

I highly recommend this to anyone.

5 out of 5 stars

GET IT HERE: A Woman in Berlin: Eight Weeks in the Conquered City: A Diary

The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

Standing on the fringes of life offers a unique perspective. But there comes a time to see what it looks like from the dance floor.This haunting novel about the dilemma of passivity vs. passion marks the stunning debut of a provocative voice in contemporary fiction: The Perks of Being a Wallflower. This is the story of what it’s like to grow up in high school. More intimate than a diary, Charlie's letters are singular and unique, hilarious and devastating. We may not know where he lives. We may not know to whom he is writing. All we know is the world he shares. Caught between trying to live his life and trying to run from it puts him on a strange course through uncharted territory. The world of first dates and mixed tapes, family dramas and new friends. The world of sex, drugs, andThe Rocky Horror Picture Show, when all one requires is that perfect song on that perfect drive to feel infinite. Through Charlie, Stephen Chbosky has created a deeply affecting coming-of-age story, a powerful novel that will spirit you back to those wild and poignant roller coaster days known as growing up.

I actually feel like there is something wrong with me because every friend of mine who has read this book really liked it and rated it 4 or more stars but I just couldn't love it. I was underwhelmed with this book. I can give three main reasons why I feel this way, too.

One, is the main character. Charlie is a 15 year old boy who is about to start high school in the beginning of the book. This is unbelievable while reading it. For being 15, Charlie is incredibly naive to life and the world. He also seems to have some sort of emotional handicap. I even thought he might have aspergers at one point. Charlie was set up to be this incredibly intelligent kid, who was in AP classes, whose teacher gave him extra assignments and even said he was the most intelligent people he has ever met. Yet, he didn't know about basic things that teenagers, who grow up in normal families in normal cities going to normal public schools, know and cried at the drop of a hat. He grew through the story and in the end we find out the reason why he acts this way, to an extent, but it still wasn't realistic to me.

Reason two, I wasn't thrilled about this book was, while reading it, you get a very 60s/70s feel from it when, in fact, it is set in the early 90's. If it weren't for the date being posted at the top of each letter I would never have guessed it was set post 1980.  It had such a hippy feel to it that I wouldn't and don't associate with the early 90's.

Finally, reason number three. Every single "controversial" issue that teenagers could go through, including homosexuality, drug use and sexual abuse (just to name a few), was in this book to bring out your emotions. Because of the overuse and the narrative, though, I didn't feel much of anything emotionally. I actually felt used. Like Chbosky was trying to exploit my emotions to make me love his novel. Books making me feel cheap and used do not make the top of my list.

Despite all these things, the writing isn't bad. There are a few great characters, Patrick in particular and some of the story is quite good. The growth in all the characters was great to read about. It will never top my list of favorite books, though.

2.5 out of 5 stars

American Gods by Neil Gaiman

After three years in prison, Shadow has done his time. But as the days, then the hours, then the minutes, then the seconds until his release tick away, he can feel a storm building. Two days before he gets out, his wife Laura dies in a mysterious car crash, in apparently adulterous circumstances. Dazed, Shadow travels home, only to encounter the bizarre Mr. Wednesday claiming to be a refugee from a distant war, a former god and the king of America. Together they embark on a very strange journey across the States, along the way solving the murders which have occurred every winter in one small American town. But they are being pursued by someone with whom Shadow must make his peace... Disturbing, gripping and profoundly strange, Neil Gaiman's epic new novel sees him on the road to finding the soul of America.





This was my first taste of Neil Gaiman's writing. I bought it about 6 years ago, read it, loved it and lent it to a friend, who just recently gave it back to me. I wanted to reread it. I remember loving it and recommending it to people but I could only really remember one scene of it. So, I wanted to see if I still loved it and remind myself what it was that I loved so much.

I have written a review on another of Gaiman's books Neverwhere and gushed about his writing. I stick with that sentiment. He knows how to draw you in and never let you go. His descriptions are fascinating and, at times, beautiful. I can't get enough of it.

On to the story itself. It is a mesmerizing story of gods, old and new, and a man named Shadow, who is a bit lost in life, down on his luck and gets sucked into this world where he fits in more than he could ever have imagined.

I think it is a good thing I gave this book another read through. There is so much going on in the plot that I don't think I could have possibly taken in all of it. There are so many different gods to keep up with, symbolism to absorb and, once again I will say, the wonderful writing (I'm done now, I promise). I loved the mythology. I have always been interested in it. The way Gaiman presents it, though, is so intriguing, introducing you to all these gods in flashback and showing the different cultures they come from. Shadow is so likable, too. he gets frustrating at times but he is just a big lug you can't help but love.

The story gets dark and creepy at times and there are quite a few NC17 scenes (maybe even R) but that just adds to allure of the book. It gives you so much to think about, too. Society and it's values are put into question. Have we really stopped believing in gods of our ancestors and started worshiping, instead, modern technology and science? That may be an easy question to answer now, but read the book and learn more. It is truly thought provoking.

The only reason I didn't give this a full 5 stars is because it gets a bit long winded in parts. Really, though, this is a great read.

4.5 out of 5 stars

GET IT HERE:American Gods: A Novel

Night Road by Kristin Hannah

For eighteen years, Jude Farraday has put her children’s needs above her own, and it shows—her twins, Mia and Zach—are bright and happy teenagers. When Lexi Baill moves into their small, close knit community, no one is more welcoming than Jude. Lexi, a former foster child with a dark past, quickly becomes Mia’s best friend. Then Zach falls in love with Lexi and the three become inseparable. 

Jude does everything to keep her kids safe and on track for college. It has always been easy-- until senior year of high school. Suddenly she is at a loss. Nothing feels safe anymore; every time her kids leave the house, she worries about them. 

On a hot summer’s night her worst fears come true. One decision will change the course of their lives. In the blink of an eye, the Farraday family will be torn apart and Lexi will lose everything. In the years that follow, each must face the consequences of that single night and find a way to forget…or the courage to forgive.

This is the second book of Hannah's I have read. It is also the second time she has led me on an emotional roller coaster. Hannah has an innate ability to write such emotionally charged characters that you can't help but care about.

Jude, mother of twins Mia and Zach, wants nothing more than the best for her kids. She gives them freedoms while still hovering. She is a helicopter mom. So, when Lexi enters their kids lives she is hesitant to let her in. After a while they all welcome Lexi into their family which makes everything especially hard when tragedy strikes. Now, they all have to live with the decisions they made on that fateful day.

That sounds kind of predictable, right? I thought so too and it is sometimes. But Hannah's story telling brings you so far in so quickly that you just don't care. Then, she throws in a twist. Then, another twist. It all becomes very hard to put down. There were moments where I skimmed paragraphs, the author sometimes gets carried away with details, and the ending felt rushed and slightly forced. But, the characters, oh the characters, they made up for any flaws in the book. I loved them all. I felt frustrated with them, happy for them, sad with them and everything in between. One of the definitions of a good book, for me, is when all is said and done and you put it down, you feel like you have lost a friend. I felt that with this book. I didn't want it to end because I wanted to know more and see where these characters lives take them.

All in all, this is another great book from Kristin Hannah. I will be reading more from her in the future.

4 out of  5 stars

GET IT HERE: Night Road
Also, check out: Winter Garden Another great book by Kristin Hannah.

The Photograph by Penelope Lively

It opens with a snapshot: a young woman, Kath, at an unknown gathering, hands clasped with a man not her husband, their backs to the camera. Its envelope is marked DO NOT OPEN-DESTROY. But Kath's husband, Glyn, does not heed the warning. The mystery of the photograph, and of Kath herself and her recent death, propels him on a journey of discovery that sends shock waves through the lives of her family and friends. The elfin Kath-with her mesmerizing looks and casual ways-moves like an insistent ghost through the thoughts and memories of everyone who knew her: self-centered Glyn, past his lusty, passionate professorial prime; her remorselessly competent sister Elaine, a doyenne garden designer married to feckless ne'er-do-well Nick; and their daughter Polly, beloved of Kath, who oscillates between home and family and the tumultuous new era she inhabits. 

Oh, where do I begin? I did not enjoy this book, which disappoints me, as always. The premise sounded interesting but it was poorly told. The characters weren't developed, I had no feelings for them, one way or another. Plus, it so painfully slow. I only read the first chapter and skimmed the rest. I waited for it to pick up and go somewhere but it never did. When I can figure out the "twist" about half way through a book that I am only skimming, that tells you how bad it was.

What else can I say? The book was slow, morose, boring and predictable.

I am not a fan.

1 out of 5 stars